((additional edits made by Max))
((additional snark added by Jon))
- November 29: We welcome Jareth! He’s a thief with a very chilled out demeanor. We fail to cast Cure Disease on him, which proves to be a big mistake.
- Flint arrives looking more bedraggled than usual. He fills us in the huge assault is underway on the third level of the five-tiered tague. A horde led by mindflayers has stormed an access shaft, and taken a bunch of dwarves while also constructing some creepy glowing towers….pylons, if you will.
- The group met with Gen. Clague (a community playhouse), and Sir Calaph di Sutherland takes point on negotiating a military contract with the necromancer/inn proprietor Khar’ghul. Sir Calaph channels Saza Loripine Spirewind and Tobbar Riker by getting an 8% finder’s fee on all of Khar’ghul’s dwarves profits for one year.
- In a moment that we all could have foreseen, Flint almost botches the whole thing by demanding a zone of truth be cast on the General. (Scribbed note to the side: we needed to make sure he wasn’t being controlled by the mind flayers. Not my fault if he got all huffy about it. -F) After some Truth Zone lazzi, everyone is begrudgingly on the same page, but seriously, we need to stop letting Flint talk to people. He’s the Pirate Irving of Rangers.
- Someone is dead! Again, no idea who or why or what is going on or wtf…can we get let in on the story here?
- MacDougal Wyth has some intense wheeling and dealing with super conspirator Karem Coalstriker over who is the crew that will blow Thier Three considering the king isn’t too interested in that. Mac and Karem agree that much like in life, it is the woman who will get this shit done.
- Mac also has an intense tete-a-tete with Lady Brumthiel (A Brothel Madam and font of dwarf info!) Mac learns that Lady Brumthiel is a double agent giving the king information on Mac’s plans to end the war (GASP!), but when Mac offers her a better life she decides to be a TRIPLE AGENT (GASPS!) and for real help Mac and company now. Mac swallows his salty anger and they enjoy booze and chase romance.
- Sir Calaph buys some seafood
- Dwarf-uators, Mount up! We descend to level three and begin a massive (combat) push against the forces of the under dark. There are sacrifices on both sides. Siege weapons are sabotaged, lines are pushed, spell levels are lost!
- Shelby decides to take up a bow and join the fight in what critics are calling an artificial attempt to ramp up the drama. Sir Calaph gives Shelby a commendation and a reprimand.
*Khar’ghul loses all of his zombies to the horde, then loses his life. Then we lose his corpse, which is embarrassing and deeply upsetting at the same time.
- Tyrell–young, dumb, and full of evoker mana–charges onto the battlefield and, despite his big fireballs, is overrun by goblins.
- Jareth farts. This becomes his signature move.
- A metric shit-ton of XP later, we enter the final battle in the Dwarven favelas
- Hobgoblins! Drow! A monster made of bullshit!
- Sir Calaph commands the commander to “command” his “member” to start the battle
- Mac summons the sun, revealing the Drow to just be pasty Cure fans
- Jareth builds a reputation as silent-but-deadly
- A displacer beast attacks Sir Calaph! Oh no,his terrible jaws are rending his flesh, oh horror oh okay, just kidding, it’s Baba in panther-mode with seafood taped to his coat.
- The bullshit monster falls down a lot, then mac hits it with a building into a temple that collapses on it. Bullshit, meet bullshit.
- Teyrnon Maedoc gets dropped, but the Drow using him as a human shield gets his head pulled off by a surprise Serpentine Owl attack. Ca-caw! Paladins that heal together, um, feel together.
- Flint and the Commander roll 1’s at each other, flopping around like two penguins engaged in mortal combat
- Defeated but noble (apart for the jerking off bit), the Commander dies a warrior’s death.
- We did it! Didn’t we? Mac’s plan to blowup the access shaft hasn’t come tor fruition just yet, but the third level belongs to the Dwarves once again.
- Conspicuous absence of Mind Flayers….and what’s up with those pylons?
XP: 8370 a piece!!! Eat your heart out, Verthrax!